4 Weeks to G-Day: To quiet the dusty basset run on the south side of the house, spread 10 (!) tons of 3/8” desert brown decomposed granite (DG) on all dirt areas on the side and front of the house.  Saved several hundred bucks by going to Pioneer Landscape Materials on I-19 and Valencia (recommended by a neighbor on E. Stratford).  Another neighbor, Paul Bessey, brought over his wheelbarrow and helped load it with the heavy DG (didn't know at the time he is a young 81 - hope I can help neighbors at that age!).  Spouse spread the rock using very handy 36” landscape rake.  [Note to self:  our 3/8” DG is a great choice with the dogs, but the “3/8”-minus” DG contains all sizes from 3/8” down to dirt and looks more natural.]

22 Days to G-Day: Start work to add 2x8 redwood lattice on top of south wall to add a bit of privacy and visual appeal.  Stain lattice using Behr transparent weatherproofing wood sealer and finish.  Gives redwood a rich brown color and protects for 6 years.  Whereas spouse and I normally cannot paint within 30 feet of each other (I say I am just a careful painter, she says if I want it that way I should paint it myself), in this case we could both slop sealer on each end of a 2x8 lattice.  Suggestions:  (1) wear cheap cloth gloves to protect hands, (2) goop up arms with a heavy moisturizer like Jergens Extra Healing so no paint or stain will stick to you, and (3) use a good brush.  My absolute favorite all-time brush is a 3” angle tip long-handled brush by Wooster (the high end Purdy brand is similar).  Why spend $15 - $20 for a brush?  Well, I gave my spouse the good brush, and I used a so-so brush, and I could hardly keep up with her.  The good brush is lightweight, holds a tremendous amount of paint, does not drip, and reaches further with the long handle.  After painting I then become the brush Nazi.  It only a few minutes to rinse out most of the paint under a faucet, but the key is the next step:  put dish detergent on both sides of the brush and then paint the brush on the inside of the sink or a bucket, forcing the bristles almost 90 degrees from the handle.  A good brush can take it, and you will be amazed at how much paint is released when you work the detergent up to top of the bristles by the handle.  [Notes to self:  (1) don't stack the lattice on top of one another when staining, as the drips that are caught on the lower pieces will always look bad; (2) don't use oil stain on a good latex brush, as my good Wooster looks like someone cleaned it with a blow torch after I touched up some oil stain on the house with it & then cleaned it with mineral spirits (sniff).]

20 Days to G-Day:  Start work to prepare the wall under the lattice for painting.  Patch several 1” vertical cracks through the wall with the miracle home repair product, Interior - Exterior Premixed Cement Patch in the blue bucket in the paint department.  Goes on like whipped butter, but sets up like rock.  Wire brush and chip out the loose paint on the wall.  Clean wall with a product intended for windows - Windex Outdoor concentrated glass cleaner.  Hook up the green Windex bottle to a garden hose, and watch how clean it makes your windows (and wall in my case) with no scrubbing.  Roll on the paint, using a quality roller and the super large roller tray with disposable liners.

9 Days to G-Day: Daughter and boyfriend are visiting from San Diego.  Poor lad agrees to chip out some broken accent tile in the brick walkway by the pool.  The tile comes out easily, but it takes a big hammer and chisel to remove enough mortar to lay new tile.  He is sweating profusely, but is game to show the old guy he can do it.  (Is it OK to take advantage of him this way?)  I suggest to my spouse that the replacement decorative accent tile I brought home is very attractive.  We go back to the tile store and pick out tile that is more attractive - 4” Mexican tile, laid 4 on a side, with a center section in warm colors surrounded by blue tile. .  I quickly mix up a batch of thin set to show everybody how easy it is to lay this tile - and after only an hour, the 16 tile are exactly in place.  [Note to self:  don't lay the tile when you know the thinset is a little too watery, as it takes longer to harden.  In my case, I awoke the next morning with 4 of the tile being cockeyed because a basset hound walked on them, leading to more practice tile work.]  As the 25 year-old mortar in the brick around the accent tile was mixed by an amateur (me), it is worn about ½” or more down from the brick.  Reskim with new pre-mixed mortar (can't mess that up), but add a little sand to match the color of the existing mortar.  Also, use mortar with a little cement coloring to fill in the water-worn bricks in the front walk so no one will trip on them.

8 days before G-Day: Goal:  Replace fascia board on overhang of west side of house where a roof leak rotted the board.  Board is a 2x4, 12 feet long, nailed horizontally to beams that project from the house, and also nailed vertically from the roof.  No problem with the right power tools he says.  I bring out my trusty circular saw (to cut the fascia board in sections), and my reciprocating saw with a demolition blade (to cut the nails behind the fascia board holding the board to the beams), and then pry the board down off of the roof nails.  Works more or less as planned.  [Note to self:  don't forget to patch the roof in two spots where the demolition blade sawed clean through to blue sky.]  

1 day before G-Day: Attempt to mount new fascia board.  The board I bought 2 weeks earlier, which at that time was perfectly straight and very heavy, is now so twisted and curved that it cannot be attached to the house by mere mortals (the spouse and I).  Ergo, I go to the Depot, buy another board, and install it immediately.  [Note to self when selecting wood:  seems counterintuitive, but lighter is better, as the wood contains less water and will shrink and twist less when drying.]

4 Hours before G-Hour: Organize the utility area in back of the house.  Fill up garbage cans, place large materials bound for the dump in the alley, hide other stuff out of sight.  Clean the pool, mow the lawn, and sweep up the patio.  Be agreeable when spouse wants to plant one last plant - as the freshly painted wall on the south side just called out for a mandevilla flowering vine.  Set out bottled water in an ice chest and cookies for the guests.  With 15 minutes until G-Hour, take a shower.

G-Hour: Take Sunday paper and cup of coffee onto patio, and wait a delicious 30 minutes in the chaise lounge before guests arrive.  (This 30 minutes is the most relaxing time spent outside in the last 3 weeks.  Heaven.)